Japan and being Japanese

I had been staying in Japan for more than 7 years. Was planted by the company I worked before, moved from Bali to Ishigaki. A small island in northern part of Japan. First came, all I can say was only ohayo, konnichiwa and konbanwa. But now, I can speak and read the hiragana, katakana and some kanji. I was told by my other half before that I am so noisy while driving. What??? I want to learn the language, so that I am pointing the curls and strokes all along the way. And nagging him to tell me the meaning and to read. Noisy? Yes, definitely for sure I was noisy to top of my lungs.

Second part, I am not used to eat with chopstick. I can use chopstick, even among us three siblings, I am the first mastering how to use it. But as daily eating apparatus? I used to use my hands at home and fork, knife and spoon while on dinner table eating with my colleagues. I am amused on using two slender sticks to pick foods and put it into my mouth. Along the times, I had reached that without chopsticks I am not been able to eat. Except when I am eating Indian curry and naan. But for some reason, natto, wasabi and fresh seafood are out of my menu. Allergic reason.

Futon or bed? Thirty more years I used to sleep in bed. But here in Japan, I had to use futon. No problem as long as I have my stuffed toys around. So far, I have ten of them. The one I always hold is pyungte. A Kirin shape, big enough to replace bolster I am so missed from home. Then I have two futon sandwiched together with soft bed pad, and 100% cotton bedsheets. Also have blanket. I was wondering if my sleeping habit back in Indonesia prepared me to live in Japan. Even though it was hot back in Bali, but I always used blanket. Sleeping arrangement is okay for me. So far, I don't have any problem.

Transportation by means I used bicycle to go everywhere. Especially for going to work. There are
buses I sometimes use. And taxis. Even have one number ready on speed dial if ever I need one. After twenty years never riding bikes at first I wondered if I will be safe. But like old saying, practice will make you better. Done with those artificial living arrangements, I came to the most part of staying in Japan.

Being a Japanese. Not like I want to change my personality or even my ancestry. But here, if you stand out means they will give you hard times. I was wondering why here people are uniformed. Their personality, their attitude and their being presence. You may have different clothes, different shoes, even strange or bizarre haircut. But coming to become a proper Japanese means you had to be one. One mould, one thinking, and one attitude. I was educated by my parents to be frank, to be no gender biased person, and never having an iota of being racist. I am a woman, second class. Check. I am a foreigner, second class check. Being a foreigner, woman and well educated? It is hard. So hard that sometimes I want to admit defeat. One thing my parents taught me is that I can't admit I am beaten until the last effort in my pocket.

Educating Japanese to receive a woman having a better position, well educated, and can be equal with man is so hard. Chauvinist, now I really understand the meaning. I am not asking emancipation at the fullest, but at least try to receive us, women can do better. Alas, all I have is full throttle constraints from my male colleagues. Even someone told me that I need to put men above me to have a warmer reception. I tried, what happens next is they tried to put my head underneath their shoes. I had come to conclusion that being me is just being me. I don't want to be belittling anymore, I don't want the men to put restraints on me because I am a foreign woman with education and experiences under my belt to become subservient.